Man do I like blowjobs. Receiving them, not giving.
Anyway, I just ate some cremeschnitte, and good god was it bad. The "creme" part was like styrofoam or something. I'm telling ya, it's insane. It kept its shape you could practically use this stuff for thermal insulation. Just look at it for heaven's sake:
See how it's keeping its shape perfectly? No, that's not good. It's supposed to fall apart and be all creamy and mushy and all that goodness.
Seriously, it's all the fault of the styrofoam-industrial complex. They're in charge, no kiddin'.
Well, call me a tinfoil hat guy, but I think they took over all the cake companies and are planning something. Something big. I don't know what yet, but I'm sure as hell no good's gonna come out of it. Honest.